I was driving home from dance and heard Jason Mraz singing "I'm yours" on radio disney. I got his huge burst of anger. I wanted to go punch his stupid face and break his stupid nose and smash his stupid, happy guitar and then burn those lyrics until they were nothing but stupid, unrecognizable, ash. I hated how blissfully happy he was when I was sitting here with unhappy and dry eyes burning in my crappy decisions. How can people be so happy when there's so much to be sad about?
If only I could just cry and then maybe the huge pit of absolute despair that is eating away all my organs will go away. It could be a release. But no. For now, I have nothing left to look forward to except maybe having the pit eat my liver so I can drink more apple tinis.
I'm kidding.
I want to destroy something. Do something destructive. I want this ugly pit to go away. I want to do something wreckless and crazy and get rid of it. This doesn't even correctly explain how I feel. This times a million.
And it's been like this since wednesday.
This stupid, ugly, monstrous, hole in my inside.
I hate boys.
